Being Too Honest

I was reading an article about dating this morning. This is a clip I wanted to keep and share, "There is something very sexy about a person who remains a little mysterious, so leave a few shadows in your past." I guess I better learn this technique.

To my surprise there is a guy at work that has made it known of his attraction and interest towards me. The catch is keeping it at a down low due to work. I was flattered, but I am not getting my hopes up, yet at the same time I am not pushing him away. I am just playing it cool. As cool as I can.

I didn't realize there are so many do's and don't to dating. I never dated in junior or high school. Listening to my oldest talk about his friends and his own experiences, the do's and don't come and go. They learn by making them and moving on and then that very same person comes back after they moved on. Interesting. hahaha. It appears with adults, the game is different. Everything I read suggest there is no time to make mistakes and no come backs because adults don't forgive as easily or due to the fact the clock is ticking. Talk about stress. WHO really has it.... the teens or the adults. hhhhmmmm. Hard to say. I can diffinately tell you it is hard. I made a lot of don'ts with the man who has my heart right now and that is the dodgeball goof. I am still praying that he is removed off my heart if God wills it, but if I can be perhaps a bit too honest right now, he is still on my heart always. I don't know what God has in store for me. I thought I knew once, but I am totally not going to worry about it.

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Matt attended his second day of school today. His father called this morning to wish him a good day. I am so thankful that my ex and I are communicating a lot better and smoother in regards to our youngest. It feels great to have peace. As far as our oldest, not the same. There is so much tension built up. They (Chris, my oldest, and my ex) are always findings ways to either keep him away from me or to give me a difficult time when with me. I won't go into how it is difficult, I wouldn't want you to become upset.

Anyway, I am learning to let things slid more and to be swept under the rug. Basically less things are bothering me. I am letting go of my oldest, not because I love him any less or care any less, but he is coming of age where his life is his and he has to decide wether to visit me is important to him or not. I pray one day he will realize I am his mother, not my ex's new wife. I pray he will realize he needs me in his life and will come around more, especially as he gets older. Yes, there was major pain in coming to realize this, but the pain is weaking and almost non-existant.

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Life goes on!!! Whether we want it to or not. All we can do is keep moving forward. Focusing on the positive and most of all focusing on God and our relationship with him through the son, Jesus Christ.